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Web Marketing Ezine

November 13th., 2002                 Issue #212                  ISSN 1444-2027



1. Sponsor's Message
2. First Word
3. Tips, Tools, News and Views


Advertising's What You Pay For, Promotion's What You Pray For

- Another Form Of Intrusive Advertising
Cluetrain Manifesto Thesis #22

Search Engine Rankings, And Our 'Marketing Jokes' Pages 

- The Three-Fingered Salute; The Two-Fingered Salute

- Free Training Course: Copywriting: "7 Direct Mail Secrets..."

- E-Commerce Definition: Customer Relationship Marketing

4. A Touch of Humor:
Dog-gone Amazing 

5. Classified Ads
6. Free Training Courses
7. Feature Articles: 


- Top 12 Tips To Writing Effective Google AdWords Select Ads

   by Michael Wong

- Mona Lisa Your Branding

  by Shaun D'Souza

8. Our Companion Ezine 
9. Administrivia

Visit our companion website at http://www.WebMarketingEzine.com

Want to read this online? For your convenience, the Current Issue 
of WME is posted each week at the WME website. Just visit 
http://www.WebMarketingEzine.com and click on Current Issue.

1. Top Sponsor's Message



The Newbie Club PC & Internet Companion. Probably The Most Staggering Collection Of PC & Internet Tips & Tutorials You'll Ever Find - In The Easy Laid-Back Language That's Made The Newbie Club� Famous Around The World. Check it out...




2. First Word



Hi All!


The most interesting aspect of the last 2 weeks has been our experiment with Dan Thies' formula for achieving top Search Engine rankings. We used our new 'Marketing Jokes' section as a test, and came up trumps- #1, #2 and #3 rankings on Yahoo! and Google. Look for improvements to the structure and content of the Web Marketing Ezine site, as we strive to provide you with better service, and reach out to more new readers.


Thought For the Week:

"What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?"
- Robert Schuller


Till next week, have a good one!




3. Tips, Tools, News and Views



Advertising's What You Pay For, Free Promotion's What You Pray For!


George McKenzie is just the person show you how to get it! Download his FREE ebook, "Free Publicity Fast Track" right now!



Another Form Of Intrusive Advertising


A few weeks ago, we mentioned a service called DirectAdvertiser. This service offered to send out unsolicited bulk messages in a way that would get around the few limits that are placed on unsolicited bulk email, better known as spam. At the time, we didn't know how the service worked. Well, in the intervening weeks, DirectAdvertiser has gone. They'll be no loss, but there will be others pushing the same annoying, invasive technology.


Our investigations have shown that the way the service works, is to take advantage of a messaging feature built into Microsoft Windows 2000 and XP, called net send. When a message is sent to you, it pops up in the middle of your screen, over the top of whatever you are doing. We're all going to be thrilled with that! I'm glad I'm still using Windows 98.


For the lowlifes who will mis-use this system, one appealing feature of this spamming method, and there's no other word for it, is that the sender doesn't even have to know your address. The system works with IP addresses. The sender can pick a range of IP addresses, and if you're in that range, you'll get the message. The use of IP addresses will allow the sender, in many cases, to send messages to areas chosen geographically.


Web Marketing Ezine is taking a stand against this type of unwanted spamming. Please help publicize this coming problem, and please mention that you 'heard it here first'! I hate to give out the URL of one of the perpetrators, but it's wise to 'know thine enemy'. And this process IS an enemy.


Find out what's coming, at http://www.quicksend.biz/


EzineAnnouncer: It May Be Just What You Need


Next issue, we'll be bringing you a Product Review of a truly excellent program for ezine Publishers, called EzineAnnouncer. Watch for it! 


Cluetrain Manifesto Thesis #22

"Getting a sense of humor does not mean putting some jokes on the corporate web site. Rather, it requires big values, a little humility, straight talk, and a genuine point of view." 

Read the whole Cluetrain Manifesto at http://www.webmarketingezine.com/cluetrain.htm

WME Supported By...

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Nothing is left to the imagination...Web Design Mastery takes you step by step through the entire process. Don't miss out on the special, introductory price, or the bonuses, click here!

Search Engine Rankings, And Our 'Marketing Jokes' Pages 

Putting up a collection of almost 30 Marketing Jokes has been a lot of fun, but it also has a serious web marketing dimension.

Last issue, we did a review of Dan Thies' excellent ebook 'Search Engine Fast Start' , which shows you how to get high search engine rankings. Following the formula in Dan's book, we submitted the pages to Google. Happily, the main 'Marketing Jokes' page now ranks #3 (on debut!), for the search term 'marketing jokes'. We also got #2 for the same term on Yahoo! -an excellent result. Even better, we have the #1 ranking on Google for 'marketing joke'. 

We've also been delighted with traffic to the pages, which has helped push us to record traffic numbers, and raised our Alexa ranking from 97,000 a month ago, to below 80,000 as I write this. 

The pages have brought some nice comments. This from Alex Brunelle 'Official Jokester' at Aha! Jokes, one of my favorite joke sites... "That's a LOT of marketing jokes; you really have an extensive collection -- good job on it!" Thanks for that, Alex. 

Why not catch up on the whole collection, at http://www.WebMarketingEzine.com/marketing-jokes/marketing-jokes.shtml

and check out the ebook that made our three Top 3 rankings possible.



The Three-Fingered Salute; The Two-Fingered Salute


I always enjoy reading Joe Robson's Newbie Club Newsletter, and I always something useful. Here's a handy tip from the latest issue, for those delightful times when your computer decides to 'freeze'.


"Right now, you can press three keys on your keyboard, and Windows will prepare to abort itself. Those three keys are Ctrl, Alt, and Delete. Pressing them is known by geeks and nerds as "the three fingered salute." Try it. You won't hurt anything. You can click the Cancel button.

What happens? When you press the three-key combo, the Close Program dialog box appears. It's a fail-safe. When a program stops responding, or a your computer seems to freeze, you can try the salute. However, things may be so far gone that even this won't help. So the last ditch effort comes into play. Here it is...

Try the two fingered salute.

Hold down the Ctrl key. Now, while keeping it depressed, press the Esc key. Ctrl-Esc. Not "control minus escape" (this isn't math!). Ctrl-Esc is just shorthand for "hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the Esc key."

With any luck, the Start menu will open. You'll then be able to gracefully exit windows without it committing sudden death on you, requiring a reboot and a run of Scandisk. (By the way, when you do reboot, and Scandisk wants to run, you can just press the Enter key and the process will be skipped.

Computers think they're smart. They put up messages that you obey, because you don't know differently. But truly smart programs always give you options and explanations, letting you decide what's best.)"


This is just a sample of the helpful, friendly advice you'll get at The Newbie Club, most of it free. When you visit the Newbie Club site at http://www.newbieclub.com?free_membership, be sure to subscribe to Joe's excellent ezine.

(Disclosure: I am a member of The Newbie Club's Affiliate Program)


WME Supported By...


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Finally - a fast, simple, and effective system that targets your best customers and brings them to you for free. Get Search Engine Fast Fast Start



Free Training Course of the Week: 
Copywriting: "7 Direct Mail Secrets Guaranteed To Create A Stampede of New Business!"

Direct Marketing is the most disciplined form of copywriting there is. In Direct Marketing, response rates are measured to two decimal places. There's nowhere to hide! Whatever the Offer and Creative elements of the campaign are, the Copy has to do the job, and the Sales Letter is often the vehicle. Yanik Silver, author of Instant Sales Letters, is a master in his field.

To take this, and many other free training courses, visit



E-Commerce Term of the Week: Customer Relationship Marketing


A one-to-one marketing model in which all the information about a customer, gathered throughout the history of that customer's relationship with the company, is used to market to that customer in a way that promotes trust, loyalty, and therefore, increased sales.

-Source: NetLingo- The Internet Dictionary http://www.netlingo.com
The NetLingo Dictionary book is 528-pages of over 2500 terms. Learn more...

WME Supported By...



4. A Touch of Humor



Dog-gone Amazing


A man was out driving, when he came across a flock of sheep. He got out of his car, and walked over to the shepherd tending the sheep. He asked,


"Are you a betting man?"


"Why do you ask?", said the shepherd.


"I'll bet you $20, to one of your sheep, that I can guess the size of your flock.", he said.


"You're on", said the shepherd, "How many sheep have I got?"


"367", came the answer.


"That's amazing," exclaimed the shepherd, "You're absolutely right! go and pick yourself a sheep."


Having claimed his prize, the man was walking away, when the shepherd called out to him.


"How about another bet- double or nothing.", he challenged.


"What's the bet?", said the man.


"I'll bet you that I can tell your occupation, and who you work for."


"That's a bet." said the man. "What do I do?"


"You're a marketing consultant, and you work for the government.", said the shepherd.


"That's amazing," said the man. "How did you figure that out?"


The shepherd smiled. "Put down my dog, and I'll tell you."



Enjoy dozens more marketing jokes on our new Marketing Jokes pages at http://www.WebMarketingEzine.com/marketing-jokes/marketing-jokes.shtml

5. Classified Ads

Ezine Advertising WORKS! Showcase your ad. in "The Human Face of
Web Marketing", at just $20 for four insertions. Just go to

How Much Is One Good Sales Letter Worth To Your Business?

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FREE five lesson class shows you how to improve the your results 

WOMEN! THIS LIST IS FOR YOU! THE BALANCED WOMAN! Send a blank email to; [email protected] 

Read about your business's future at: 

Improve Your Search Positions-Get your FREE WebPosition Software

Earn Advertising Income From Your Website Or Mailing List! 

Article Announce - The Free Writer & Publisher Connection 
Subscribe: mailto:[email protected]

Your own infoproduct? Take the FREE InfoProduct Masters course!
Just send a blank e-mail to [email protected]

Serious about writing that book? Look at this site!

Become a high-earning Affiliate-take The Affiliate Masters course
Send a blank e-mail to: [email protected]



6. Free Training Courses

Increase your knowledge; hone your skills; improve your results! Take advantage of some of the finest FREE training courses on the Web by visiting our Free Training Course listing at;

You'll find courses on IT, Computing, Software, Business and Personal Development.
With over 35 courses to choose from, you're sure to find something!



7. Feature Articles



Top 12 Tips To Writing Effective Google AdWords Select Ads

by Michael Wong

Mona Lisa Your Branding
by Shaun D'Souza


8. Our Companion Ezine: A Better Life:ItsYourFuture!

Enjoy Humor, Inspiration, Romance, Fitness, Nutrition & Personal
Finance- all aimed at helping YOU to take control of YOUR future!
Subscribe FREE by sending a blank email to:
mailto:[email protected]

                            BE HAPPY BE HEALTHY LIVE LONG & PROSPER

9. Administrivia


Contact Information:
to subscribe: [email protected]
to unsubscribe: [email protected]
Note: This is an Ezine. So sorry, NO postings are accepted
contact John Payne: [email protected] NO SPAM PLEASE

Advertising Information:
Please go to: http://www.webmarketingezine.com/advertise.shtml 

This publication was designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regard to the subject matter. Subscribers are sent this free weekly e-zine with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, or other professional advice. If legal advice or other professional assistance is required, we advise seeking the  services of a competent professional.

John Payne does not accept any responsibility for any liabilities resulting from any claims in articles or advertisements published in WME, or the actions of the parties involved.

This publication is for informational purposes only.

� Copyright 2000-2002 John Payne All rights reserved. Web Marketing Ezine may only be redistributed in its unedited form. You are welcome to forward it to as many people as you like, with our thanks. Written permission must be obtained to reprint or quote original material published in Web Marketing Ezine.

               Web Marketing Ezine is published by John Payne 



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